December 12, 2008
Protected: Memories…
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December 10, 2008
December 9, 2008
If there is a War to be fought, it’s battlefield is my Mind
and the frontier; my thoughts and feelings about myself in relationship with others.
I remember the days when everything there was, was a Mind, thinking she was brilliant and in ultimate control. My Mind, dragging along a body, she imagined was there only to make her elevated and letting her experience the small pains and pleasures of physicality, soon to be abolished by Her pure intellect. In these days there was a shrewd and constant struggle between my feelings and reason. One trying to tell the other off and determine whom was more righteous to make judgement over the rest.
I am also reminded of the first time I was told I could tell her to “Shut up”! The thrill going through my body when first playing with the sensation of having just one single moment of Silence; true silence, where NO thought, unasked for, would be able to push its opinions or insinuations upon the moment of “Here and Now”; the experience of a true I AM.
Together with these, are the numerous moments I have learnt to cherish, when my Mind finally has understood she has the right to vacations. She is much appreciated and greatly needed, but just like her piece; feeling and reason, none where meant to dominate and pass ruling, on their own. Locating my Mind as the Head of the Body, is to miss whom and what has the authority to be the Savior.
December 8, 2008
December 8, 2008
For in him we live and move and have our being…
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Oh, how wonderful, are those moments when I really do sense that I am Dancing Through Life.
Those days, hours and minutes when I am fully aware, that my beloved has “Hemmed me in, behind and before”, he surrounds me and I may just dwell in that loving presence wherever I turn my steps. In those moments, it does not really matter, if I am sad or happy, exhausted or thrilled, longing or content…. Wherever I am and whatever I feel, what matters is that
He is moving right there along with me,
He is breathing life into me
and I can experience the Joy of Movement.
Movement of my breath, the blood in my venes, pulse of my heart, touch of my skin, wiggle of my toes, caress of my hands, circle of my hips, stretch of my arms, leap in my legs, nod of my head, taste in my mouth, bow of my core, bend in my knee and smell of the freshness of the earth.
How Fearfully and Wonderfully I am made
With ALL of that, I want to Love you back, Dance in a Holy Worship, offer myself into Your Arms,
and This is the way I forever want to move, the way I always want to live my life!
November 25, 2008
listening to an amateur orchestra play a really good Symphony by a composer you Love dearly…
I KNOW what I will be experiencing is this Wonderful, Masterpiece; minutes and hours of crafting and molding put together, with the ultimate goal of perfection.
All the evidence point to the FACT that the near future will hold for me a perfectly balanced harmony of tenderness, excitement, joy and adventure. There might be some unexpected crescendos and partitudes in sorrow, but all of them eventually unfolding into a great climax of Abundance and unwavering Peace.
As much as I Know this, am expecting it and looking forward to being a part of it all, I cannot really relax into this truth, before I can sense it happening to me.
When the people close to me, the ones that are assumed to play important roles in presenting this reality to me, show signs of being out of tune or unable to perform their part with skill, my Heart starts wavering… it might be the slightest motion, moving to e-motion, and from a faltering Heart the path is not long to end up in a state of tremble.
November 23, 2008
Guard me as the Apple of your eye; hide me in the shadow of your wings.
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November 14, 2008
Lord, you are my lover, the object of my desire, you are like a stream flowing through my body, a sun shining in my face. Let me be your reflection.
O Lord, love me intensely, love me often and long! For the more often you love me, the purer I become. The more intensely you love me, the more beautiful I become. The longer you love me, the holier I become.
O burning mountain, O chosen sun, O perfect moon, O fathomless well, O unattainable height, O clearness beyond measure, O wisdom without end, O strength beyond distance, O clearness beyond measure, O crown beyond all majesty, the humblest thing you created, Sings your praise.
I cannot dance, O lord unless you lead me. If it is your will, I can leap with Joy. But you must show me how to dance and sing by dancing and singing yourself! With you I will leap towards love, and from love I will leap to truth, and from truth I will leap to joy, and then I shall leap beyond all human sense. There I will remain and dance for evermore.
Mechtild of Magdeburg (1210-1280)
November 10, 2008
Today I had one of the best Dates ever, in my life so far…
It is soon three months since our honeymoon started. I’ve taken time, about once a month, to spend a day, a whole week or just one afternoon, together with My Beloved. One Saturday it was adventures in the woods, enjoying swimming naked in the river and walking bare feet on the shores. Another time we went dancing for a whole week – just the two of us, surrounded by others, joining in, in the same tunes – what a pleasure trip – yes indeed 
Today we went down-town, sitting in a Café reading, enjoying pasta and a glass of good red wine. Viewing the rainy streets and sipping a hot White Chocolate Piece of Art Latte. Then we walked, side by side, down to the Extravagantly Beautiful Concert hall, to listen to, be engulfed in, an overflowing Outpouring of stings, rhythms and brass. The intensity and magnitude of this glorification, devotion and praise touched me deeply.
Throughout centuries, for the passing millenniums, human kind has been co-creating wondrous small pieces of Beauty… I believe, All of us, knowingly or unaware, are giving of ourselves as an act of worship. This afternoon, I got to share hundreds of these pieces, displayed all around us, with my beloved. Experiencing (a small part) the deep Gratitude with which HE receives these Gifts of ours, carried forth, to Him, for Him, in Him and through Him.
What kind of Love is it, that bears fruit, in such Multitude? What kind of Lover do I have, who can simultaneously share these things with me, genuinely Delight in Me, while at the same time BEING the source for all creation?
My Dearest friend sent me this poem the other day:
Only that illumined ONE
who keeps Seducing the formless into form
Had the Charm, to win my Heart
Only a perfect ONE
who is always Laughing at the word Two
Can make you know of LOVE
Why would I ever settle for Less? (more…)
